That’s our Boo Boo Queen. Note the Band-Aids on each arm, almost a week after her 4-year checkup. Her cup is filled with morning goodies: One Flintstones Vitamin, 2 Fiber Gummy Bears, One Claritin and a few “treats” she gets when she sleeps all night long (this day she got TWO sour gummy worms!)

But back to the Boo-Boos. Ever since the fingernail issue, we’ve been keeping the Band-Aid character lines in business: Dora, Disney Princesses, Strawberry Shortcake, Doc McStuffins, Jake & the Neverland Pirates, even Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. A constant stream of bandages for Zoe’s poor nails, usually 2 or 3 at a time for the past few weeks.

And then, we went to the doctor.

Add 2 MORE Band-Aids where those two “Are You So Impressed With Me?” shots were on each arm, which she replaces every day. Then she pinched her leg at school. Band-Aid. And I swear she fake injured her own foot just to put on another Band-Aid. Ironically, I found a REAL Boo-Boo near her elbow, which looked like an asphalt scrape that she hadn’t even noticed. She said “Oh” and stuck on another Band-Aid.

Don’t get me wrong – she clearly has some “Boo-Boo” issues. We know this by the sheer number of Boo-Boo reports we get from school. Here are just 2 of them, 2 days in a row last week:

Of course, neither of those required a Band-Aid… but that hasn’t stopped our dear Zoe from finding new and lingering Boo-Boos that DO urgently (and repeatedly) require Band-Aids.

I’ve tried the following, to no avail:

• I stated the obvious: “Band-Aids are for real Boo-Boos”
• I got more specific: “Band-Aids are for Boo-Boos that have blood, not bruises”
• I poked fun: “Wow, you must be the Boo Boo Queen” (she loved that…)
• I appealed to her intelligence: “Band-Aids are expensive – they’re not stickers”
• I threatened: “If you keep using all those Band-Aids, we won’t buy any more ‘fun’ ones”

NOTHING has worked. Every day our Boo Boo Queen “finds” Boo-Boos and insists on applying Band-Aids. Then she diligently removes them before (or during, ew) her shower every night and before we can intervene, she has applied new ones…

Now, I know what you’re thinking. We’re the parents, right? Just take them away. Just tell her no. HIDE THEM!

Well, I challenge you to get around 2 consecutive hours of sleep every night for 3 weeks, interrupted by diaper changes, breastfeeding, and getting a newborn back to sleep THEN look into the beautiful eyes of your 4-year-old who REALLY wants to be the one getting all that attention and fight over Band-Aids.

We already struggle to keep the rest of our days as normal as possible, to find patience for that just-a-little-too-smart-but-oh-so-cute talking kid when she does the normal kid stuff (like not listening or leaving her shoes/toys etc in the middle of the floor). Hey, maybe we should just buy some Johnson & Johnson stock and get over it… ;)