So first things first:

No, this was not an accident.

My sweet husband and I – even though we are old, or maybe especially BECAUSE we are old – have had many a conversation about whether or not to have another child. We are so lucky to have an amazing child already, so on the one hand, why take chances that a second child might be less wonderful (and did I mention, we’re old?) Yet on the other hand, our child is SO terrific, it’s almost cruel not to at least try to give her a lifetime friend and playmate, right?

I love MY sister so much, and Bart has 4 fabulous siblings of his own; Family is important to us both.

And so, we’re thrilled to be on the road to Terrific Child #2 – though unlike Perfect Pregnancy #1, this one’s been well, different. First, I’ve been nauseous for about 7 weeks or so (with Zoe, I had NO morning sickness). The bright side? Apparently nausea is a sign of a healthy pregnancy – it’s also a potential sign of “multiples”, so before you ask, we have confirmed there’s only one child in there. Honestly, I never even THOUGHT of that, since we weren’t “enhancing our efforts” at all, but phew.

Second, turns out “Old People” have a greatly increased chance of lots of bad things, especially very scary chromosomal abnormalities, so it’s been a more stressful trip. The cool part? Technology has come a LONG WAY since Zoe was born just 3.5 years ago! Enter the Panorama test.

The test has been FDA approved for almost a year, and it’s pretty amazing! From a simple blood draw, they can isolate fetal DNA in the mother’s blood and test for the most common chromosomal issues, for microdeletions which cause intellectual and physical disabilities AND for gender – all starting at 9 weeks. And compared to the other options out there, it’s also remarkably accurate.

So imagine how excited we were to take the test – and how impatient I MIGHT have been to get those results. And how I may have called the doctor’s office for 5 days straight, beginning on the day they thought they might have results. We even timed our first trimester ultrasound screening (which also screens for abnormalities) to make sure we HAD those results. And yet, we didn’t.

So the day after we got the visual “all clear” from the ultrasound, I called the doctor’s office AGAIN. Turns out, they had the results but only a doctor or nurse could share them with me, and no one was available… So (since I spend my life on back-to-back calls) I gave the doc permission to leave the results on my voice mail, then obsessively gave my cell phone to my husband “just in case” he wasn’t on the phone when they called back.

He missed it. Thankfully, the doc left MOST of the results on the voice mail – everything but gender. We were so excited to know that all the important stuff was perfectly normal, but of course, we also had been excited to know the gender, too ;) And of course, the doctor’s office phone was going to their answering service…

So my husband, who never obsesses about ANYTHING, decided to swing by the doctor’s office with my cutie pie daughter in tow to see if he could wrangle the info out of them. The office was closed, but the door was ajar – he went in. The front office ladies were there, and he sweet talked them into asking the nurse for the data (who says Bart Johnson is lacking some communication skills?! not when it counts.)

Then, instead of just telling him, they offered to write it down and seal it in an envelope. That’s how I got the photo above and why we had to wait another 2 hours to open that envelope.

HELPFUL TIP: If you really want to know what’s in an envelope, don’t let a 3-year-old do the opening.

Unlike the 5 Christmas cards she ripped in her haste to get into those envelopes, this envelope had a slow, centimeter-by-centimeter opening, and as she was opening it, we realized, she can’t read. That said, she DOES know her alphabet, so Bart said, “Just tell us if you see a B or a G“. To which she responded “It’s a G“, and her parents started screaming and jumping up and down.

She had no idea what she’d just read – she had no idea we were pregnant!

So I knelt down and we had the following exchange:

• Me: How would you like to have a little sister?
• Zoe: OH MOMMY! I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A LITTLE SISTER! THANK YOU SO MUCH!”
• (insert big hug)
• Zoe: Can I see her?

There’s no good answer to that one, by the way. Ultrasounds look like aliens – not the best thing to show your little girl who just pictured the slightly younger but equally mobile and verbal little girl playmate you just offered her. In fact, she can’t wait to teach her little sister to hold hands in the parking lot, read a book, and of course, we need to buy her a dance outfit, so Zoe can teach her to dance.

We’re going to have a rough first couple of years while she figures out what babies do (and don’t do). ANY AND ALL TIPS APPRECIATED.

In the meantime, we’ll just focus on making a healthy baby – and getting ready to celebrate my husband’s 50th birthday in June, when he realizes he’s about to be half a century old with a newborn.

FAQs

• When are you due? September 23, 2014
• Is that Virgo or Libra? Could be either – Zoe was 11 days early…
• So how far along are you? 13 weeks, 3 days
• Is Bart really turning 50? Yes.
• Have you two lost your minds? Likely. But as with most crazy people, we’re ecstatically happy ;)